


our last brain cell

by katierosefun



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Ahsoka Tano is a Little Shit, Alternate Universe - Crack, Anakin Skywalker is a Little Shit, Crack, Darth Maul is a Little Shit, Everyone is a Little Shit basically, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Human Disaster Anakin Skywalker, Human Disaster Obi-Wan Kenobi, Humor, bloopers, rex is a little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:48:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24239059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katierosefun/pseuds/katierosefun
Summary: While everyone was crying over the tragedy of the Siege of Mandalore, the TCW fam was basically just laughing their heads off on set. Basically, Anakin trips over everything, Obi-Wan has the band-aids for on-set disasters, Ahsoka pranks people, Rex is just trying his best, and Maul is weirdly polite. They all share one brain cell.
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, CT-7567 | Rex & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 54
Kudos: 329





	1. OLD FRIENDS NOT FORGOTTEN

**Author's Note:**

> This is purely crack because,,,I just kind of want to pretend that the whole last arc didn't happen, and everything is just staged and super-meta, and really, the TCW fam is just having a grand old time putting on this great tragedy for the viewers and are really just chilling on set and eating the catered food and mimicking each other's dramatic lines. That is all.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"Anakin, where are you?" Obi-Wan grumbles, ducking down just as another beam of laser shot over his head. There are a few moments of silence, and this time, both Cody and Obi-Wan turn to look at the camera in confusion. Anakin Skywalker is supposed to arrive to the scene at this point and give his suave "right here" response, but—

Obi-Wan clears his throat. " _Anakin_ ," he repeats louder, "where are you?"

"Right—" There's a _thud_ and then some light swearing (all of which are bleeped out) before the camera swings around and focuses on a certain Jedi Knight sprawled across the ground, a sheepish look on his face. "Right here."

Obi-Wan and Cody exchange an exasperated look (well, Cody an exasperated little head shake) before the director shouts, "CUT!"

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

"Anakin, where are you?" Obi-Wan grumbles.

"Right here," Anakin replies, confidently strolling up to the camera. He looks down at Obi-Wan. "What are you doing down there?" A laser beam comes whizzing past his way, and Anakin shifts a little to his side, but just as he does, another shot comes for his head, and Anakin ducks completely down.

"What was _that_?" Anakin asks as he gets back on his feet. "Was that supposed to—"

"You're not supposed to aim for his head!" the director shouts.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"Just hang on a little longer," Rex says, making his way back to his men.

The expected chorus of groans go up: "sir, yes sir", and then there's a sudden _whoosh_ in the background, and Rex (and the camera) look up just in time to see one lone trooper already zipping out from under the bridge.

Rex turns back around to the camera and says flatly, "Someone else is getting him this time."

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

" _Ahsoka_ ," Anakin says, stunned. "Wh—I don't believe it!" He tilts his head up at Ahsoka's flickering form. "Where—" He stops short and looks between Obi-Wan and Ahsoka. "I wasn't supposed to start off with that, right?"

"No," Obi-Wan and Ahsoka chorus.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

"Hello Master," Ahsoka says, folding her arms over her chest. "It's…" She narrows her eyes, and then she whispers, horrified, "I don't know what I'm supposed to say next."

" _It's been a while_ ," Anakin whispers back up at her.

"Thanks," Ahsoka whispers.

"No problem, Snips."

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"That's one way to look at it, I suppose," Obi-Wan muses, keeping his arms folded in front of him.

Anakin frowns and starts to dive in front of Obi-Wan, but before he can, his foot gets snagged on something—which he would later realize is the hem of Obi-Wan's robes—and crashes right into his poor master. The two go toppling down with sharp cries of alarm.

" _Anakin_ ," Obi-Wan groans.

"Sorry!"

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

R2-D2 comes whizzing through the hanger as Ahsoka makes her last step off the ramp. Maybe the droid was a little too excited filming the scene, or maybe Ahsoka had taken one step farther off the ramp than expected, because the droid collides against Ahsoka's shins.

For a solid moment, Ahsoka tries to play off the incident as though they had been planning it all along. It's not until Obi-Wan's guiding Bo-Katan away from the ship does Ahsoka double over by Anakin, whispering, " _Ow_."

Laughter erupts on set. Obi-Wan comes quickly rushing back with a bandage. There is some embarrassed "No, Master Kenobi, I'm _fine_ —okay, okay— _wait_ —" Ahsoka just barely manages to lift her head up to the camera, sheepish smile already on her face. "Sure, let's keep this in."

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"Company! Attention!"

There was the quick stomping of boots against durasteel as the clone troopers snaps to attention, but right at the last second, the helmet from under Rex's elbow comes toppling down.

"Sorry," Rex mutters, and he ducks down to pick the helmet back up. He lasts only a second before he's smirking, and then Ahsoka and Anakin are both laughing. The entire company bursts into snickers before the director shouts for a re-take.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"That's not fair."

"I'm not trying to be."

There is a silence. One second, two seconds, three seconds—

Both Ahsoka and Obi-Wan look at Anakin expectedly.

"Wait, was that my line?"

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

"That's not fair."

"I'm not trying to be."

"I'll…" Anakin gestures. "Divide the 501st. Make a new division under Ahsoka's command!"

"Unfortunately," Obi-Wan starts, "Ahsoka is no longer a grand member of the grand—oh, that's not it—"

"Just keep going," Anakin says in a stage whisper.

"No, I'm not a grand member of the grand anything, grand Master," Ahsoka chirps.

"You two," Obi-Wan sighs, shaking his head.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka leaps off the smoking ship and onto the landing platform. Her feet hit the platform, and sticking her light sabers out, she only just starts to dig the blades into the ground when an untimed gust of wind knocks her barreling forward head first instead.

"Are you okay?" Anakin shouts from off-camera.

"Fine!" Ahsoka shouts back. She picks her head up from the ground and, flashing the camera a thumbs-up, says, "We're doing that again, right?"

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

Ahsoka stands with her light sabers drawn behind herself. As Mandalorians stream out from behind her, Rex comes shooting down with a jetpack. He only gets about halfway to the landing platform before another gust of wind came forcing him rather ungracefully to the ground.

Keeping a straight face and ignoring Rex's muffled swears, Ahsoka says, "Beat you."

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka runs through the tunnels, her light sabers the only source of light. She turns her head from one side to the other, following the distant shouts of the troopers, and she started to pivot on her heel for the direction of the sound when she tripped on an unfortunate trooper's arm.

"Sorry!" Ahsoka whispers as the pretend-corpse of a trooper groans.

"It's a miracle," comes Rex's dry voice from somewhere off-camera. "He's alive!"

The trooper Ahsoka had tripped over laughs, and then Ahsoka and the rest of the cast and crew are laughing too.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

The distant clang of Maul's boots against the tunnel floor echoes around the setting, and Ahsoka rights her light sabers.

"I was hoping for Kenobi," comes Maul's ominous voice. There is more clanging, more painfully dramatic echoes, and then a beat. Ahsoka waits patiently, light sabers still drawn at the ready.

Another beat, and then Maul says, "I'm sorry, I believe my foot's gotten caught in something—" There is some shuffling and then stifled laughter, followed by an annoyed, "Someone put some kind of magnet here—"

The camera zooms in on Ahsoka's face. She flicks the camera a single shrug, followed by a wink.


	2. THE PHANTOM APPRENTICE

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"Not yet," Maul snarls, and with a sharp gesture of his arm, Ahsoka and Rex go barreling into the wall. There's a dull _thud_ of Ahsoka and Rex's skulls knocking together, and then both go " _ow_ " in unison.

Maul stops short. "I'm so sorry," he says, wincing. "Was that harder than—"

"Definitely harder," Ahsoka groans. "You're gonna pay for that."

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"You have best get going," Obi-Wan says, looking over at Ahsoka.

Ahsoka nods, and she starts for the steps leading out of the chambers. She pauses, and then, turning to the hologram, opens her mouth to say—

"I will."

There's an awkward silence, and then Ahsoka asks, "You'll what, Master Kenobi?"

Obi-Wan pauses. Then, realization dawning on his face, he groans.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

"Tell Anakin—"

"I will."

Ahsoka pauses, and then, giving Obi-Wan one last look, she turns around and starts to head up the steps. She takes two flying leaps before one of her feet gets caught on a step, and there's a loud crash as she lands on the ground. Rex scrambles down from his position to help Ahsoka up, and she bounces up on her feet, her facial markings standing out just a bit more than usual.

"Totally meant to do that!" she says.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"And you're going to help me," Maul says, giving Jesse a sidelong look.

"We can go round and round this circle if you want," Jesse starts, rolling his head around his neck, but just before he can continue, there's a loud _pop_ ping sound that echoes around the set. "That felt _good_ ," Jesse only says, grinning as somewhere in the background, someone winces.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Gar Saxon lands on top of the lift, his jet pack just barely shutting down before Bo-Katan comes crashing on top of him. There's a sharp yell from Saxon, and then the two are in a heap on top of the lift.

"Sorry," Bo-Katan says, gingerly slipping off Saxon. "You good?"

"No," comes Saxon's annoyed reply.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"Care to tell me what all of this is about?" Ahsoka asks, shifting herself already into a fighting stance. "Or would you rather save it for the Council?"

Maul laughs lightly. "Oh, no, no—" He turns around, and after a beat, he laughs again—a bit more awkwardly this time, and then he glances off the set. " _Dammit_."

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"The Jedi can stop Sidious before it's too late," Ahsoka says.

"Too late?" Maul asks, exasperated. "For what? The Republic to fall? It already has, and you just can't see it! There is no order, no justice, no—" Maul stops and then he pauses, looking up at the ceiling. "No _justice_ , no _order_ —no, no _justice,_ no _law_ , no _order_ —" He looks at the cameras. "No _justice_ , no _law_ , no _order_ —is that right?"

"Yes," comes the response.

"Wonderful," Maul says. "Again, I suppose."

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

"The time of the Jedi has passed," Maul says, and Ahsoka suddenly flinches backward, a hand quickly rising up to brush against her cheek.

"Did I just spit on you?" Maul asks.

" _Yes_ ," Ahsoka replies.

"I am so sorry—"

"It's fine, it's fine, no one saw it—"

**SCENE X: TAKE THREE**

The glass shatters all around Ahsoka and Maul with a great gust of wind. Embers fly in the air, and another wave of artificial wind comes rushing through—only a bit too strong, because both Maul and Ahsoka sway a little to the side.

They keep a straight face, but then Ahsoka topples a little too much, and then both Ahsoka and Maul are fighting back the urge to smile.

"I believe that wind came in too strong," Maul calls over his shoulder.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"Obi-Wan was right," Ahsoka says, igniting her light sabers. Maul turns around to see her standing behind him, her eyes narrowed. "You _are_ difficult to kill."

There is only a second before Ahsoka dives at Maul, light sabers aimed at the ready. Maul ignites his light saber at the last second, fending off her blow right on time. They pivot and whirl around each other, their feet and movements light against the beams. The beams creak loudly from underneath them, but none seem to mind.

Maul pushes Ahsoka off to a beam, and she waves precariously on the edge before her foot slips, and she falls. She just barely catches herself, letting out a quiet swear that, unfortunately, the microphones pick up.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

"We could have destroyed Sidious!" Maul hisses over the clash of their light sabers.

"Only for _you_ to take his place," Ahsoka snarls back, and she aims for Maul's legs. Maul blocks her strike, braces her light sabers back. Ahsoka takes a few steps backwards, and she ducks her head back just in time to avoid a blow to the neck. She catches his light saber with her own and thrusts upwards, matching the movement with an elbow jab and a kick to what was supposed to be Maul's face. Her foot lands on Maul's nose instead, and he totters backwards, blood already dripping from his nostrils.

"Cut! Guys, no more nosebleeds!"

**SCENE X: TAKE THREE**

As Rex shoots down two more people, Ahsoka's light sabers just barely miss his head. He ducks to the side just as they land right next to him, and he looks up.

"Was that supposed to happen?" he only asks the crew, who are all shaking their heads.

**SCENE X: TAKE THREE**

"Join me," Maul says, panting, "or die."

Ahsoka gives Maul a hard glare. "Never," she says.

That is all the response Maul needs. He dives at Ahsoka, light saber flashing and the beam bouncing under his feet. Ahsoka braces herself for impact, but before she could grab Maul's light saber, there's a squeak and a squeal of a missed boot on the beam, and then Ahsoka wobbles as the beam suddenly dips from where Maul had slipped off, his hands gripping the edge.

"Are we _sure_ that we want to fight on this thing?" Ahsoka asks to the crew below.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

"You're all going to burn!" Maul hollers. "We're all going to—" He coughs and splutters suddenly, and then, grimacing, he asks, "Who let the bugs in?"

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

"You don't know what you're doing!" Maul shrieks, struggling against his binds, but there's a flash of blue light from Rex's pistols, and then Maul drops. There's another harsh squeak of boots against the ground as the Mandalorians are almost suddenly pitched forward in an effort to keep Maul afloat against his restraints.

Both Mandalorians clang against the sides of the gunship, and then there's both some laughter and swearing as they regain their balance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next update will hopefully be in two-three days! Also, if any of ya'll would like a soundtrack to go with this fic, I have a playlist titled 'our last brain cell' on Spotify. My username is katierosefun, and I promise you there are meme songs abound to fit these idiots.
> 
> As always, comments/kudos/subscriptions are greatly appreciated!


	3. SHATTERED

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“Commander,” Rex calls, walking forward to meet Ahsoka. “I have the—” He stops short and cringes, shaking his head. “Trying that again.”

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

“Commander,” Rex calls, walking to Ahsoka. “I have the Council wai— _stop laughing_ ,” he says and looks at the camera. “You can’t see her, right?”

“Nope!”

“So I’m just allowed to do whatever while he speaks, right?” Ahsoka asks.

“You _could_ ,” the director says thoughtfully. “But—”

“Great,” Ahsoka says. “Rex, let’s do that again.”

**SCENE X: TAKE THREE**

“Commander,” Rex calls, and he only makes it a few steps towards Ahsoka before he’s fighting back his own smile. “ _Stop_ ,” he says, and Ahsoka whirls around to the camera to reveal her own wide grin. “We’re supposed to be _serious_ ,” Rex says. “ _Serious_.”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“Actually,” Ahsoka says, crossing her arms, “I was hoping to speak with General Skywalker.”

“I sent him to inform the Chancellor that General Grievous has indeed been located on Utapau,” Windu replies, and he lets out a short breath afterwards that all the microphones pick up. “Sorry,” he says, looking up at the cameras. “That’s a _long_ sentence.”

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

“I sent him to inform the Chancellor that General,” Windu starts, and then he takes another breath before continuing, “Grievous has indeed—why are you laughing?”

Ahsoka stifles her smile. “Sorry,” she squeaks. “Go on.”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka walks over to Maul in his lockbox. “Feeling comfy in there?” she asks, knocking on the glass.

There’s some muffled words from the other end, and a moment later, Maul pulls his head out from the mouthpiece. “Quite cramped, actually,” he replies lightly. “This is _not_ as comfortable as it looks. Would you like to try this instead?”

“Nah, I think I’m good,” Ahsoka replies.

“Quit fooling around, you two!”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka starts to lift her arm in salute, but before she could, she whacks Rex on the side. For a moment, both Ahsoka and Rex pretend that nothing happened, and only until Ahsoka’s hand is by her head does she start giggling.

“Is your hand alright?” Rex asks, trying to stifle his own smile.

“No, I’m pretty sure I scraped something,” she replies, still laughing.

A minute later, Obi-Wan comes from off set, and Ahsoka starts laughing even harder when he extends a Band-Aid.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“It’s Anakin,” Ahsoka says, rushing away from the bridge. “I feel like something terrible has happened.”

But Rex stays turned away from Ahsoka, his hand trembling. The helmet slips away from his grip, but instead of rolling away, the helmet drops right on Rex’s foot.

There is once more a silence as everyone on set pretends that that was supposed to happen, but when Rex turns around, he takes one look at Ahsoka’s face before everyone starts laughing.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

“It’s Anakin,” Ahsoka says, rushing from the bridge. “I feel like something terrible has—oops—”

Rex’s helmet slips away a second too early, and Ahsoka ducks down to grab the helmet. She sticks it back under Rex’s arm, repeating, “I feel like something terrible has happened.”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“Find him! Fives!” Rex shouts, and he fires.

Ahsoka ducks out of the way and lunges for Rex. She slams him against the holoprojector, but before she could get on top of it, her foot slips, and she lands face first on the holoprojector instead.

“Sorry, sorry,” she says, rolling over on her side.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

Ahsoka leaps for the vents just as the smoke overtakes the room, but before she can fully lodge herself into the vents, both of her light sabers come toppling from her sides, and they land on the holoprojector.

Rex puts away his blasters and reach over to the light sabers. He throws them quickly up to the vents, where Ahsoka snatches them out of the air.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Maul clears his throat, and when Ahsoka turns around, he looks pointedly at her light sabers. “Care to give me a fighting chance?”

Ahsoka narrows her eyes. “I’m not—oops,” Ahsoka winces as she almost whacks Maul with her light saber. “Are you okay?”

“Let’s try _not_ to decapitate me,” Maul says, taking a quick step away.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“R7, bring up that report,” Ahsoka says as the hologram dies before her.

R7 only beeps back a response.

“It’s sealed?” Ahsoka asks. She drops her arms to her sides. “Try Anakin’s passcode. Eight-one-oh-eight.”

From somewhere in the distance, Anakin whispers, “That’s when we first met.”

“Yes, Anakin,” Ahsoka replies, keeping a straight face as R7 pulls up the report. “We know, Anakin.”

“Proud of us!”

“Yes, Anakin,” Ahsoka replies. “I’m proud of us too.”

“Guys, who let Anakin in?” the director asks, annoyed.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

The droids all wait in line as the clone troopers rush past them. Once seeing Rex down the corridor, they start making their way across. But Rex comes in too quickly, and instead of just bumping into the droids, he topples over R7’s dome and lands on his chest.

“I’m fine!” he calls from the floor.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

“Where is she?” Rex asks, pulling out his blasters. He aims for the droids, but before any of the droids could respond, Ahsoka sidles up behind Rex.

“I’m right here,” she says, and Rex turns around too fast—there’s a sickening _thud_ as both Rex and Ahsoka’s heads knock against each other.

“Sorry, sorry,” Rex says quickly, grabbing Ahsoka before she could fall over. “Is it bad?”

“No, you’re good, you’re good,” Ahsoka replies, rubbing her forehead.

**SCENE X: TAKE THREE**

Ahsoka’s practicing lifting Rex up off set.

“Kind of like bridal style,” the director suggests.

Ahsoka grins and looks down at Rex, who doesn’t have his helmet on. “Heard that, Rex?” she asks sweetly.

“Just do what you have to, Commander,” comes Rex’s response.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka deflects the onslaught of laser bolts, her light sabers little more than a blur as more and more troopers come shooting. She backs slowly away, light sabers still moving, and then a blast knocks one of her light sabers out of her hands. Ahsoka grunts and slides against the console, but instead of leaning against it, she slides down to the ground and lands with a soft _thump_.

Everyone stops shooting as Ahsoka looks up from the ground. “Oh _no_ ,” she says flatly. “I’m _dead_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would just like to note that I had to turn off the volume of this episode and put on subtitles to reference it while writing this chapter. I also had to blast my goofy playlist while reading the subtitles because I just,,,really couldn't bring myself to watch the episode with the sound on. (Ooph, I have no idea how I'm going to be able to watch the actual finale without crying. But...we're out here smiling through the pain!)
> 
> Also: this story will actually have five chapters instead of four, so even after the next chapter with the bloopers for the finale comes out, you guys *will* have some more chaos post-season 7. So keep an eye out! I've been having fun outlining that chapter.
> 
> As always, kudos/comments/subscribes are greatly appreciated!


	4. VICTORY AND DEATH

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka Force-pushes the troopers out of the way, but instead of the troopers slamming into each other, they’re all blown back against the wall. Ahsoka cringes and brings her hands to her mouth. “Are you guys okay?” she calls, and it’s not until she gets a few flashed thumbs-ups before she relaxes.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

As the smoke clears, the droids come from their hideout. They move a little too quickly, though, and R7 slams into the back of Rex’s legs, causing him to stumble forward. He lifts his arms, trying to regain balance, but then Cheep comes crashing into R7, who crashes a little more into Rex, and then Rex topples over one of the supposedly stunned troopers.

There’s resounding groans from both Rex and the trooper.

Ahsoka turns around and only puts her hands on her hips. “See this?” she asks the camera. “ _I’m_ the serious one.”

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

The droids come rolling out from their hideout once more, and instead of running into Rex, R7 runs straight into the back of Ahsoka’s legs. She topples forward just as Rex grabs her back. He yanks her back to her feet, but perhaps too quickly, because Ahsoka slams back into him, and Rex crashes into the wall behind them.

“I _swear_ we know what we’re doing,” Ahsoka says.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“He didn’t escape,” Ahsoka says, turning around briefly. “I let him out.”

“What?” Rex asks incredulously. “Why?”

“Diversion,” Ahsoka replies, already turning back around. “Come on!”

As Ahsoka rounds the corner, Rex shakes his head. “That’s one way to—” The rest of the sentence dissolves in a series of nonsense babble as Rex shakes his head again. “Sorry,” he says, laughing. “Got stuck.”

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

“He didn’t escape,” Ahsoka says. “I let him out.”

“Why?” Rex asks. “What? Wait—”

**SCENE X: TAKE THREE**

“He didn’t escape,” Ahsoka says. “I let him out.”

“What?” Rex asks. “Why? Wait, did I—”

“That was right!” Ahsoka says over her shoulder.

“But we’re still shooting that again,” the director adds.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Maul runs down to the trooper standing in the center of the hyperdrive room. He only gets about halfway before he slips and crashes to the ground.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

Maul runs down the walkway of the hyperdrive room. He ducks a laser bolt, but he ducks a little too far to his right, because he sways and crashes to his side.

“Fine!” he says, bouncing back to his feet.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka steps towards Rex. She gently sets her hands over his helmet and starts to pull upwards—but then she pauses, looking first at the helmet then at the camera.

“Um,” she says in a stage-whisper, “it’s stuck.”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“You have your orders, sir,” Jesse says, blasters still positioned at the ready. “Now execute it or I will!”

Rex waits until Ahsoka and he come to a slow stop a little ways from the troopers. “The order was to execute the Jedi for treason against the Republic,” he says, lowering his blasters to his sides. He gestures towards Ahsoka. “The problem is, Ahsoka Tano is no longer a— _nope_ , have to do that again,” he says, shaking his head.

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

“The order was to execute the Jedi for treason against the Republic,” Rex says, lowering his blasters to his sides. He starts gesturing one of them towards Ahsoka. “The problem is—sorry—” Rex says as one of his blasters just narrowly misses hitting Ahsoka on the bicep.

Luckily, Ahsoka moves back just in time, sticking out her tongue in mock jest.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Before filming, Ahsoka appears in front of a camera, biceps curled and flexed. She winks at the camera, and Rex appears behind her.

“See these?” Rex asks, gesturing at Ahsoka’s biceps. “Don’t wanna mess with these.”

“Damn right,” Ahsoka replies smugly, winking at the camera again.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“Commander Rex,” Jesse says, aiming his blasters at Rex and Ahsoka, “you’re in violation of Order 66. I accuse of treason against the Grand Army of the grand—” Jesses stops mid-sentence, shaking his head. “I _swear_ —”

“See?” Obi-Wan asks from somewhere off-set. “It’s an easy mistake to make!”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

On seeing Maul race for the ship, Ahsoka jumps into action. She leaps over the gaping hole in the center of the ship and lands just a little ways from Maul.

“You wanted this chaos,” Maul says accusatorily, launching crates Ahsoka’s way. She dodges the first, then the second, but she only just barely misses the third object: a small transport. One of her feet gets caught in the handles, and she slams down to the ground.

Everyone winces, and Ahsoka staggers up to her feet. “I’m okay!”

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

Ahsoka dives at Maul’s neck, both light sabers out. She’s meant to miss him, but they come frighteningly close, and Maul stumbles backwards. He falls on his back, letting out a small “ooph!” of surprise as Ahsoka deactivates her light sabers.

She offers him a hand, which Maul gratefully accepts.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka and Rex skid across their ground, their feet grating across the ground. Still, Ahsoka keeps one hand extended towards the shuttle flying away, the other wrapped tightly around Rex’s arm. They stagger forward, and then a gust of wind sends them both flying forward.

Rex and Ahsoka disentangle themselves from each other as the rest of the company laughs.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Cheep brings the troopers up from the lower hanger, and the troopers come popping up. They’re all in the air for a second, and there’s only hysterical laughter as the troopers bounce on the small nets that were already set for them.

“Guys, we know it’s fun, but you guys are supposed to be _screaming_ ,” the director says, face-palming.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Ahsoka flies past the debris, her arms extended in flight. She whirls around Rex’s fighter, grunts as she skids past. “This,” she gasps, trying to breathe around the artificial wind, “is harder than it looks!”

**SCENE X: TAKE TWO**

Ahsoka skids past Rex’s fighter and holds onto the hatch for a second before flying away. She blows backwards, shouting, “I _swear_ I’ve almost got it!”

**SCENE X: TAKE THREE**

Ahsoka manages to secure her grip on the hatch. She slides into the seat, and blowing out a breath, waits for the hatch to close over herself. There’s only a second before she looks quizzically up at the still-open hatch. She looks at the camera and says, “I think this thing’s broken, too.”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Now clad in his Darth Vader suit, Anakin walks past a pair of storm troopers. He takes only a few steps before he suddenly falls forward, swearing softly. He lifts his head, and his voice slightly muffled by his helmet, says, “Sorry, this cape is _way_ too long—”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

Rex is shaking his head by the star fighter, and Ahsoka is bent over at the knees, shaking with laughter. The camera zooms past the two and toward the makeshift graves. Only instead of just the helmets and the bumps of dirt, the whole 501st company is dancing on top of the dirt.

“This is _so wrong_ ,” someone whispers in the background, but no one makes any move to stop them.

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

The camera focuses on Anakin and Ahsoka lounging around in the background, both of them wearing their cloaks. Ahsoka has her cloak fully concealing her face, Anakin with his cape over his helmet.

“Nice costume,” Ahsoka comments, and even though the camera can’t catch her face, anyone can tell that she’s trying hard not to laugh.

“You too,” Anakin replies seriously. “You’ve got a whole Gandalf thing going for you.”

“And you’ve got a…” Ahsoka gestures to the helmet. “Toaster thing going on?”

“But a dignified toaster,” Anakin replies seriously.

“Of course.”

**SCENE X: TAKE ONE**

“And that’s a wrap!” the director shouts.

Someone puts on music, and everyone comes tumbling to the icy set. Anakin takes off his Darth Vader helmet and lets it fly in the air like a graduation cap, where hundreds of clone trooper helmets join it a few moments later. The camera’s shaky, clearly being held by someone who’s running and jumping up and down with everyone else, but before the camera shuts off, we find ourselves staring at one lasting image:

Anakin has his arms slung around Rex and Ahsoka, whose faces are bright from laughing so hard. Obi-Wan and Padmé are pushed in a moment later, and they’re all shouting and giggling with tears in their eyes. Somewhere in the distance, someone shouts, “Group picture, everyone! Group picture!” 

The group picture ends with everyone still frozen in mid-laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I swear there's one last chapter, and it's going to be a bit of a surprise. In the meantime, though, reviews/favorites/follows are greatly appreciated!
> 
> (And oh man, I miss them so much pls someone give them back to me.)


	5. PRESS CONFERENCE

The _Clone Wars_ theme blares over loudspeakers as the cast all pile onto the stage. Waving and bowing in front of a beaming audience, they take their seats. There's some giggling amongst them, mostly as Anakin plops himself down in Obi-Wan's chair. Although the microphones don't pick up their exchange, it's clear from Obi-Wan's gestures and Anakin's smirk that this is something that has happened before. It's not until Padmé whispers something in Anakin's ear does he actually get up. Obi-Wan only turns around to the rest of the audience and lifts his arm in mock exasperation, causing the audience to laugh harder.

Meanwhile, Ahsoka lounges in her own chair set between Anakin and Rex. She and Rex are passing his helmet to one another, though at one point, the helmet nearly flies to Obi-Wan, who ducks out of the way in time for it to hit the poor interviewer. Ahsoka and Rex give embarrassed smiles to the audience, but of course, no one minds.

"What a way to start the conference, huh?" Ahsoka only says as she scrambles to retrieve the helmet from the host. There's some exchanged "sorry!" and "totally fine" before Ahsoka hops back up to her chair.

"Welcome, everyone!" the host says, turning to the audience. "I'm your host, [NAME REDACTED], and here before us, we have our _lovely_ heroes of _The Clone Wars_."

A cheer goes up amongst the audience, which triggers a series of waving from the cast.

"Alright, alright!" the host says, sitting down in her own chair. "That sounds enthusiastic to me." She looks at the cast. "How about you guys? How're you guys feeling?"

"Heavily caffeinated," Ahsoka says, causing laughter amongst the cast and the audience.

"But that makes things more fun," Anakin chimes in.

"Of course," the host says. "So then, speaking of fun," she flips open a notecard. "Our first question right now is how was the experience filming this after…" She gestures. " _Years_ of being a part of this show?"

There's some shifting and murmuring amongst the cast, and then Anakin and Obi-Wan both pointedly look at Ahsoka, who smiles. The audience whoops as she picks up the microphone. Ahsoka smiles again, and then she says, "Chaotic."

There's laughter, and Ahsoka adds, "I'm being serious! After years of being together, filming this didn't feel really real. You have to understand that what we're filming is just… _really_ heavy stuff for all of us, so I think that kind of…" She gestures towards the cast. "Set something off in all of us to make things as lighthearted as possible."

"Adding onto that," Anakin says, looking around the audience, "we definitley stayed overtime. We did a lot of takes, and not just because we kept tripping over our lines." He pauses. "Although there was _plenty_ of that too." He grins sheepishly and, leaning back in his seat, adds, "But in all seriousness, we all knew that the last arc was going to tie up a lot of loose ends, and we wanted to make it _just right_ for the fans."

"Which you guys did," the host says graciously, and the whooping from the audience is all the confirmation needed. Turning back towards the cast, the host asks, "So given tying up all those loose ends, I just want to ask all of you guys specifically how you felt after seeing your characters grow—for better or for worse—since your first appearances in _The Clone Wars_."

"Well, since you said _for worse_ ," Anakin murmurs, and there's a series of "aww" and other distressed noises as he turns towards the audience. "Yeah," he says. "I don't know what to say except it was _hard_ to film those last few episodes. Like, that first day on set _way back when_ …" He shakes his head. "You see me start off as this confident general, right? This cocky Jedi Knight, Hero with No Fear or whatever—and _that's_ the hero everyone wants, right?" Anakin presses his lips into a sad smile. "And then you just see that crumble apart over the course of the show, and of course, that last scene…"

"So that was actually you in the Vader suit," the host says.

"Yeah," Anakin replies. "I know that technically, someone else could have been brought in to fill out the suit, but everyone was really intent on having me be the one in the suit—and even though I'm all suited up, everyone can tell it's the Anakin Skywalker they first saw in _The Clone Wars_ movie, which…" He gestures. "Double the pain. _But_ ," he says, gesturing towards himself, "thankfully, everyone can see that I'm still in one piece—so I like to think that there's an Anakin Skywalker out there who's still doing okay."

"Of course," the host says. "We're seeing him right now."

Anakin grins, and then he says into the microphone, "Okay, that's the signal for someone else to speak, right?" He looks at Obi-Wan pointedly. "Your turn."

There's laughter, and then Obi-Wan says in mock weariness, "Of course." He turns to the audience and says, "Well…while I don't particularly have the same tragic fate as Anakin, I think we still see some of that shift in my character as well. He's certainly not the same as he was in the beginning of the _Clone Wars_." He shifts a little in his seat and adds, "By the time we reach the Mandalore arc, my character is at the end of his rope—mostly with the end of the war and all of the troubles that come with it. He's much more tired than he was in the beginning—and perhaps he was hoping for the end of the war to provide some relief, but clearly, that relief never comes. If anything, the exact _opposite_ happens."

"Sorry about that," Anakin says.

"Yes, well," Obi-Wan replies, looking at Anakin, "I also like to believe there's at least _a_ universe in which everyone gets the ending they deserved."

"Hear, hear," the host says, and the audience claps in approval.

"And I guess as for endings," Padmé starts to say, and there's a roar from the audience, and Padmé smiles. "Yes, avenge me," she says dryly before turning to the rest of the cast, who all beam at her. "Well," she says, "I know I only appeared in the earlier episodes, but I guess we see that I'm still the somewhat encouraging one. Which is a bit sad, seeing my character seem so full of hope when we know what's going to happen later. It's a sad situation, but at least for that moment, we see Padmé happy."

"So now we just need to freeze that shot," the host offers.

"Yes, exactly," Padmé agrees. "Just keep me alive."

There's some more laughter at that, and smiling, the host adds, "Exactly. But speaking of people who need to stay alive…" She tilts her head at Rex, who picks up the microphone.

"Right," he says. "Well." He looks at the audience again. "Here I am…?" His voice lilts into question towards the end, causing giggles amongst the audience. He looks at Ahsoka and Anakin questioningly, who both shoot him a thumbs-up. That creates more laughter, and this time, Rex allows a light laugh himself before turning back around to the audience. "Honestly, I know there's always been a question of whether my character would stay alive. Since most of us know what's supposed to happen at the end, we always knew my character's end was always in the air. I don't think any of us were aware that my character would…become as big as he became now either. Which is." He looks around at the audience. "A good feeling," he ends. "Not a lot of people take a second look at the clone troopers, so seeing that my character has some hope for him too—despite the circumstances—is a bittersweet feeling."

Clearing his throat, Rex adds, "And of course, I have to thank the fans for that. Because the fans _really_ decided to give this particular clone trooper a deeper look than I think any of us anticipated."

There's applause at that, and then Rex's cheeks darken as he sets his microphone down. He glances over at Ahsoka and, nodding at her, mouths, _your turn_.

The applause only increases as Ahsoka picks up her microphone, and there's a few seconds before the applause dies down. "Wow," Ahsoka says after a moment. She looks around at the cast. "I mean, I came into this show as a _kid_ , so this…" She looks at the audience, swallowing hard. "This is a _lot_."

There's some "aww"s as Anakin reaches over and squeezes Ahsoka on the shoulder, and she smiles.

"It's been a wild ride," she says. "But _yeah_ —my character starts off as a child, and I know a lot of the fans were children when they started watching the show, so…the fans really watched my character grow up along with them." She looks around the room and adds, "Like Rex, I wasn't really sure where my character would end up. People have always kind of thought that I _had_ to come to some tragic end because we don't really see Ahsoka show up later, right? But..." She smiles. "There has been just _so much love_ poured into my character, and just so much love from the rest of the cast and crew…" She blinks a few times and, clearing her throat, says, "So by the end of the series, Ahsoka's a lot older, and she's seen _so much_ , and she's heartbroken, but she still somehow manages to keep fighting. And she lives." She lifts her shoulders a little, smiles. "And she lives in every single one of the fans. So really, the story never ends."

There's more "aww"s (and some people can be heard blowing their noses), and even the host wipes at her face quickly.

But then, clearing her throat, the host only says, "Looking at you guys now, it's clear that you guys have grown close together both on and off set. Do you have any favorite memories you want to share?"

There's some thoughtful murmuring amongst the cast, and then Padmé says, "I think I can speak for all of us that we have _so many_ good memories of each other. From day one of filming to the last day, we've all just had all of the _best_ experiences."

"I didn't like pretending to bang my head on the pipe, though," Rex offers, which earns him laughter from everyone.

"I think the first day of shooting was the most interesting for all of us," Obi-Wan says, and there's some shared smiles and looks between the cast before Obi-Wan continues, "We were all _very_ excited to get going, which adds onto lots of jangled nerves."

"I kept tripping down the shuttle," Ahsoka offers.

"And I kept forgetting my lines," Anakin says.

"And I might have broken a thing or two on set," Obi-Wan says, looking somewhat scandalized.

"More like five or six," Anakin counters.

"The point is," Padmé says quickly, causing more tittering amongst the audience, "we've all had fun, both on and off-set."

Rex suddenly perks up. "Are we allowed to show photos here?" he asks the host.

The host shrugs. "It's your press conference," she replies, and as if on cue, the whole room dims, and a screen lowers behind the cast. Everyone—including the cast members, who swivel around in their seats—look up at the screen, and a photo montage plays: Ahsoka holding Stinky in her arms, Anakin and Rex dangling from the cliff edge at Teth. Obi-Wan and Padmé drinking tea somewhere off-set.

The photos transition through the later seasons of _The Clone Wars_ : Ahsoka flashing a thumbs-up as she and Anakin jump off a ship, Rex struggling under holding an astromech. Obi-Wan and Anakin peeking their heads out from the edge of a boulder. Ahsoka and Barriss holding up fake worms, pretending to gag. Obi-Wan hanging upside down in the mining shaft, while Satine only laughs in the background. Padmé shaking her head at something Jar-Jar must have said.

And then the photos speed up: Ahsoka doing a handstand next to Chewbacca, while Anakin gestures proudly at her. Padmé and Bail back-to-back, holding up their blasters. Rex rolling his eyes at Tarkin, whose lips are open in mid-speech. Obi-Wan meditating a stack of crates, the chest of his tunic covered in fake blood. Rex standing on top of a plant in Umbara, his hands resting on his hips at something that Fives said.

And then the photos are transitioning into purely off-set photos: Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Ahsoka sitting on top of the Temple steps. Padmé and Satine beaming on the shore of some tropical planet. Rex in civilian clothes, balancing a soccer ball on his head.

And then there are the last few photos, photos that cause both the audience to coo and the cast to slowly inch closer together:

Anakin, Obi-Wan, and Ahsoka asleep in a breakroom, their heads resting against each other. Padmé holding Anakin's hand in real life, not just in hologram. Rex and Ahsoka proudly holding up clone trooper helmets, their hands covered in orange paint. And then the last photograph—the entire cast and crew wrapped around each other in a group hug, their faces frozen in a smile.

And in that darkened room of the press conference, one can find the cast huddled together, and though their backs are turned to the audience, everyone can hear the quiet and teary laughter coming from them.

When the lights finally come back on, the cast turns around and take a look at the audience gathered before them.

There's a silence as everyone takes in the photos, take in the cast, take in this very moment.

"So what now?" the host asks at last.

Ahsoka is the one to speak.

"Now," she says, looking at the other cast members: at her family. "Now," she says, "we live on."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of inspiration was drawn from watching the D23 Zoom panel that the TCW cast held a few weeks ago. (I think you can just lok up D23 TCW or something like that to find the recording!)
> 
> I honestly have just a lot of emotions about The Clone Wars ending. For those who have been following my stories for a long time, The Clone Wars was and is really the franchise that I always go back to because this show just has such a special place in my heart. Even though The Clone Wars may have ended the chapter, the story never ends, and I'm just so grateful that we got a second chance to see these characters when second chances are so rare to come by.
> 
> That being said, the actual cast of The Clone Wars-James Arnold Taylor, Matt Lanter, Dee Bradley Baker, Cat Taber, Sam Witwer, Ashley Eckstein, and so many other voices that contributed to the show-are an absolute gift, and I'm just so thankful for each of them for bringing all of these characters to life. And of course, I'm so grateful for Dave Filoni and the animators and the sound designers and the writers and the entire production team of The Clone Wars for truly giving us a show that all of us will look back to with nothing but happy memories.
> 
> Anyways, this whole note is a mess of emotions, but I love this series so much, and writing these bloopers have kind of been my own way of telling myself that all of these people are okay, haha.
> 
> Thank you guys so much for the support for this story! I hope that I provided all the laughs and the occasional "aww" from you guys too. I'm so amazed by how The Clone Wars fandom is well and alive after nearly twelve years, and I hope that we live on too.
> 
> Luv ya bunches!
> 
> katierosefun (Caroline)

**Author's Note:**

> And they were all happy on set. There is footage of Ahsoka and Anakin and Obi-Wan taking a nap together in the break room. Rex might have taken the liberty of drawing a lothcat on Ahsoka's face with Anakin's help. Maul makes a point of mimicking Obi-Wan's accent at every turn. Obi-Wan helps Ahsoka stick the magnets to the ground but no one suspects a thing because he's Master Suave and Cool and Mature.
> 
> Next update will come in two days! As always, comments/kudos/subscribes are highly appreciated! This story will just cover the span of the last four episodes because we,,,kind of need to laugh about something.


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